In this special episode I'm bringing you the most listened-to and impactful Pep Talks for Side Hustlers of 2019 – and to share with you what the #1 belief these massively successful entrepreneurs had to change about themselves to get where they are today.
And I ask this question of everyone that comes on the show because I know in my own personal journey I've had pivotal moments where I've realized that there's something I believe about myself and what I'm capable of that is preventing me from getting to the next level.
And I know 1000% that there's something you believe about yourself that's keeping you from leveling up. So I want to know from everyone I talk to on the show what that moment was for them – and every single time I hear their answers, I have my own”a-ha, uplevel” moment.
So I invite you to check out these 10 belief changes, and then leave a comment and let me know the biggest belief about yourself that you're working on changing to get where you want to go – or one that you've already changed that's made a massive difference for you!
#10 – “That I am able. Realizing my worth.”
“I would say the biggest belief I had to change was that ‘I am able.‘ I think I had some issues when I entered the working world after college. I was the “new girl”, I was the baby. I think I stayed in that mindset for longer than I realized.
And now on the cusp of about to turn 30 I still have hints of that sometimes but I need to just realize that I'm here, I'm the thing, and I'm doing this for a reason, and I'm helping people.
It's realizing my worth that would be the answer to that question.”
#9 – “The idea that I could be successful.”
“So I think for me it's very much just the idea of ‘Could I be successful?‘ I had a very, very low opinion of my ability to succeed, I think and it really held me back.
And this goes along with your last question about what advice would you give… And this is huge. So buckle up folks:
You have to be careful about how you feel about what it is that you want in your business.
Because in the beginning I was all like, ‘Oh, I just want to make enough money to leave my job. I just need to make this amount of money to pay my bills.‘
And all I could think of was that kind of first tier and it was really limiting me from being successful and finding the business that I really wanted, which was the one that I have now. I was always thinking ‘Just enough, just enough.‘
And I had like notebooks full of, you know, ‘How many weddings I would have to shoot to make enough money?‘ or you know, ‘If I only shot this many weddings‘. And then I had a part time job that was ‘this much‘, you know, it was just a mess. I was just always thinking bare minimum, ‘How can I just get by enough to not have to do this full time job anymore?‘
And it wasn't until I was really honest with myself and I was listening to tons of business podcasts at the time and kind of drawing in a lot of inspiration from other people who had found success.
And then I really sat down and thought about what I wanted and it was very frightening to say out loud how much money I really wanted to make. And I mean, I didn't say I want to make million dollars. It was that I wanted to make six figures in my business, which at the time just was like, ‘What am I doing? Who am I? You don't deserve that kind of money, who does that?'
And it sounded outrageous and just completely unachievable and crazy that I would say that or think that. That I could possibly imagine myself making that much money, or fight things, that I just think that I could even do it.
But I got really honest with myself about what I wanted, and I think it was in that moment that I stopped playing it small, and it was always playing small and feeling like ‘That was it for me. That was all I needed.‘
But then yeah, it just came to me. I'm like, ‘No, this is how much money I want to make. This is how much money I need to make in order for my family to have what it is that we want.‘”
#8 – “I really had to let go of my obsession with thinking about what other people think of me.”
“I really had to let go of my obsession with thinking about ‘What do other people think of me?‘ I was such a follower in high school and like, ‘I don't want any attention on me. I don't want to go outside of, you know, the, this is what is normal. This is what the cool kids do. This is what is expected of you.‘
And gosh, that held me back so much in high school. I used to play volleyball and I was so good at volleyball, but when it came time to try out for the high school team, I was like, ‘Oh my God, what if I'm, I look too chubby and my shorts or what if I make a mistake and someone's watching me?‘ And so I didn't try out.
And um, that happened continually throughout high school and then even college, but when I had my daughter and when I wanted to make this business work, I realized that I just had to get rid of letting other people's opinions, and, you know what they might be thinking affect me.
I didn't even know if anyone was actually thinking that. It was just like, I don't know, some crazy mindset thing that I just had to not care. And now it's funny when I'm out and people are like, ‘Oh, what do you, what do you do?‘
A lot of people just assume that I'm a stay at home mom and when I say I work from home, some will either ask or they're like, want to stay away cause they're like, ‘Oh my God, she's going to push a product on me.‘ And I just had to let that go and I had to put myself out there and um, not let that fear of ‘what if someone thinks I'm stupid?‘ prevent me from trying.”
#7 – “The belief that I was somehow not worthy enough to talk to certain people or pursue certain things. Why not me?”
“The belief that I was somehow not worthy enough to talk to certain people or pursue certain things.
So just like you have your word of the year, for me, I chose a mantra and my mantra was, ‘Why not me?' So anytime I feel – and it's a constant battle with myself – anytime that I feel like I'm not big enough or worthy enough to talk with somebody, I remind myself ‘Why not me?‘ Like what makes me any different than anyone else?
And before I had that mantra, I was moving slow, like, and it was because I didn't think that I deserved some of the success that other people were having because I wasn't ready for it yet. But when I was at that conference, it was a real turning point for me. And I was already successful, so to speak, at that point. But I think there's constantly levels up to your success. But I was sitting at that conference looking at the people on the stage saying, ‘They're no different than me. You know, why not me? Why can't I be on that stage?‘
And then I drove home and started making things happen even more than I already was. So that belief, once I shifted it and as I continue to work on it has definitely been really monumental for me and my business.”
#6 – “I had to change the belief that as moms and as women that we have to do it all.”
“I think I had to change the belief that as moms, and as women that we have to do at all. Like we have to be the one. And I come from a very Southern background. So I thought that I had to be at home. I felt that I had to cook. I felt that I had to clean, that the house always had to be spotless and I just learned like that's not our reality and I rather have a thriving business, a happy husband, happy child, then clean laundry sometimes. And dishes will be in the sink sometimes and that's okay. And the most important thing is that we're just all happy, but everything's not going to be perfect.”
#5 – “I battled a little bit with a scarcity mindset and now I can definitely say that I am on the other side of that.”
“I think that there's more than one especially that comes to mind, but I feel like I, um, I battle a little bit with a scarcity mindset and now I can definitely say that I am on the other side of that.
So when we talked about competition earlier, like it's easy to be like, ‘Oh, well if they're getting market share, that means that they're pulling it away from me,‘ when it really isn't the case. Right? Like there's room for all of us to succeed.
Remote work is the future. So I'm, you know, doubling down on the VA space and have for some time. And it's a pleasure. Something that fills my bucket when I can help people to really do something that changes their life and their family.
So for a little bit it was scarcity mindset. I had some limiting beliefs around what I was actually capable of.
It's very helpful to have like a business coach or somebody else that sees the potential in your business that says, ‘Hey, Gina, you know, like there's no reason that this isn't a multimillion dollar business.‘
And now, you know, the more that I've heard that and the closer we get to that mark. That possibility, it seems realistic and you can go about how to break that down in order to get there. And then I think just fear and self doubt, but I tend to just push through those things anyway, using some of those same mantras and pieces of advice that I just talked to you guys about.
You know, you have to take action and you have to take action consistently. You're not going to get it right every time. But again, when you get it wrong, you're going to learn more than when you get it right.”
#4 – “Am I good enough to do this? Do I know enough? Do I need to be more certified? Do I need more education?”
“I really struggled with the thought, ‘Am I good enough to do this?‘ And it's the same thought that all of my clients now have and I really had to get over that struggle. ‘Do I know enough? Do I need to be more certified? Do I need more education?‘
And I think it's probably because that's the kind of people we are as entrepreneurs, we want to be the best and we want to get great results for our clients and we just want to show up and do really good.
Like if you were a straight a student or you went to university and did a couple degrees, like though, if you're one of those people, then you probably are feeling like that too. And it's completely normal.
But what I had to remind myself is that I, my mission and what I want is so important that I can't let all of that like negative chatter and that negative mindset – I can't let that hold me back because I do have a mission and I'm here to do something that I really believe in.
And I wanted to share this whole, this whole journey of online business with women so that they could create more freedom in their life. And that mission was so is, is still, it's so huge for me and it's so important that I need to just get over myself is what it really comes down to. We just need to get over our own self.”
#3 – “That I could run a business. And now it’s my business that’s funding this journey (of selling our house and traveling the country living in an RV)”
“That I was even capable of running a business. Like ‘What is this?‘
I didn't form an LLC until 2019 because I put it off for so long because I didn't think that I was running a business. So I just, I had to change that within myself. Like I was telling myself I was running a business, but at the end of the day it was more like a hobby because I didn't have an LLC, I didn't have a business bank account and, and have a business credit card and I come from a, like an accounting background, like ‘Shame on me for not having my sole proprietor, you know, ducks in a row‘.
But I think that was the belief I had to change about myself was that I could run a business.
And now, the situation that I'm in… Like, my kids and my husband are off on a Jeep trail somewhere because I'm recording a podcast in the only place that we have (their RV) and it's my business that's funding this journey. So that definitely was a big one that I had to overcome.”
#2 – “I had this belief that because it's a side hustle, I have to do it all myself.”
Chris Parker of www.whatismyipaddress.com
“I think I had this belief that ‘It's a side hustle. I have to do it all myself.‘ And I've learned that that really has hurt my company in a lot of ways.
You know, it's a learning experience, but there's definitely a lot of opportunities I missed out on because I felt this need that, ‘Well, I have to do it myself.‘ And part of that I think is because it, this grew up as a hobby and kind of something fun that I played with that I was never really planning on it being a business and I wasn't doing things as the book “Built to Sell” talks about, when you're doing things in your company with the goal of extracting yourself from it. Building the company up so that if you were to disappear, the company could continue to run and continue to operate because you're not integral in the day to day moving widget from a to B in order to make it work.
So much of my stuff is custom built that I'm the only person who can push out new content onto my website, which when I was the only person doing it, hey, that's great. But now that I've got content writers, that's not a good thing. When I want to go on vacation, well that means I have to work when I'm on vacation. That was fine then. But it's not, it's not a scalable thing.
And so I think I've had to change the way that I view the way that I do things. It's not that it's about me, but there's something I should doing and realizing I've got to give up a lot of these control aspects and let other people do stuff.
And the only way for the business to really grow beyond where it's at is to be trusting other people and in trusting other people with the ability to do things in my business.“
#1 – “I had to just start trusting myself.”
“I had to just start trusting myself. There's this transition phase that will happen in your own personal growth:
The first phase is when you need to learn from everybody. You need to read a ton of books and listen to a ton of podcasts and hear a bunch of other people's theories and stuff like that, because it really expands your brain into thinking, ‘Hey, there's something else out there and I can do this.‘
But then what has to happen is this other thing needs to come in, and that is this supreme ability to trust in oneself.
I didn't understand that at the beginning of entrepreneurship. I just kind of bounced around from idea, idea to theory, theory.
But when our business really started to blow up is the moment that I just decided that ‘Now I just trust myself.‘
Even if there was some guru who was making a ton more money than me and doing way more, was way more successful than me telling me to do this thing… I was just like, ‘Nah, I'm just going to trust myself.‘ And the more that I got into that phase, the better things got.”